Evelina's version

Ilmar and I met on a dating site - like where else are you supposed to meet people these days?!

Ilmar wrote to me on February 7th. His profile name was Ilx. After the hellos, I asked if his passport also said Ilx?

“After the hellos, I asked if his passport also said Ilx?”

— Evelina

I thought this would be another guy trying to make himself seem more interesting, or one afraid to use his real name because he'd have a wife and kids waiting at home. By that time, I'd already met all kinds of hairy and scary cases. For the sarcastic question I received a very straight answer though, that no, the passport says Ilmar. Evelin thought for a moment that why would a young man have such an old-timey name, but the name supposedly doeth not ruin the man. A good sign was that he didn't get defensive over my question, so we got on quite smoothly.

I'd been active in the dating scene for a solid two years by that time, and had concluded, that I already had everything: my own home, a job, hobbies, and travel. Why would I need more of all the relationships, marriage, etc... Been there, done that. But then came Ilmar, who by the way had cat allergies.

Wedding photographer: Valdur Rosenvald | Rosenvald Photography

Venue: Hotel Calacuncheddi

Videography: Awentus

Bride’s dress: Marika Arro

Groom’s suit: Errier

Wedding cake: Hotel Calacuncheddi

It took us only four days and so we already met. It seemed like weeks, though: we wrote so much that sometimes 3-4 hours passed, talking like long-time friends.

It was the eve of February 11th, a Saturday, and with the aid of some liquid courage, Ilmar decided to ask me out. The hours were late and when I finally showed up, it was just past 1 am and already the new date. We met in a Russian karaoke bar on Rootsikrantsi street, which didn't exactly make me jump up and down with excitement, especially since I am completely musically inept and have no talent for singing whatsoever.

“We met in a Russian karaoke bar on Rootsikrantsi street, which didn’t exactly make me jump up and down with excitement...”

— Evelina

No use hiding the fact that I, too, went to the karaoke bar not quite sober; otherwise, I would not have had the daring. I asked Ilmar to meet me at the door, it'd be better to go in together, and so there was the first time I ever saw him. "A nice tall man," I thought. In actuality I tend to enjoy all kinds of strange alternative dwellings and hubs, they always exist in almost parallel worlds.

To make it short and simple: that fun evening we got together and stayed together.

At first, Ilmar visited me quite seldom, but then began to come over more and more often, finally spending at least 4-5 days a week at my place. And honestly, I didn't mind at all; I'd never had someone so warm and sincere in my life before. Properly un-Estonian, talkative, organizer, optimist. Soon he got his own shelf in the closet, and then another, and then that's how he moved in. A rental apartment and occasional adventure didn't really call to him anymore.

“...I’d never had someone so warm and sincere in my life before...”

— Evelina

Ilmar's son Jasper, who was seven at the time, of course also spent time with his dad. I then naturally worried that what if the kid doesn't accept me? Would that be a dealbreaker? By now, we've gone through thick and thin, and Jasper spends half his time living with us. Gradually a part-time working dad became a full-time working dad, which is no wonder because I haven't before seen any man who cares so much about his kid and would do so much for him.

Everything moved so fast, Ilmar went on and organized everything: a date, a movie, a concert, traveling. Never once was there any talk of not having time for such things.

We indeed traveled a lot, and on October 26th, 2017, during our trip to Malta, he asked me to become his wife, and thus we went on towards the awaiting marital bliss.

My lovely two-room nest soon became small, and in January 2018, we bought our first home together.

In those two years, so much has happened it feels like we've been together for ten years!

In 2017 I skeptically thought that yeah, he's a cute guy, but he'll probably run soon, too. But I was wrong: Ilmar came, and he stayed.

Ilmar's version

Evelina and I met in 2017 at the beginning of February on, as proper for today's day and age, one of the many available dating sites.

The first lines read roughly: "Good evening! According to the site, we are a match. Wanna get to know each other?"

As a reply came Evelina's sarcastic: "Does your passport also say Ilx?"

At that moment I knew it was going to be an interesting conversation.

From there on out, there were many hours spent talking behind a screen daily until finally on a Saturday evening, I gathered my courage, with the help of many a drink, to ask Evelina out. We met up in a Russian karaoke bar on Roosikrantsi street, where I immediately got the chance to demonstrate my mediocre singing to Evelina.

“...I immediately got the chance to demonstrate my mediocre singing to Evelina.”

— Ilmar

The following relationship developed at lightspeed. Since my rental apartment, at that time, was in Jüri, I kept visiting Evelina until, by the end of April, I was already practically moved in. From the first moments, we had a great connection both emotionally and physically, and right away I had the feeling that I don't ever want to go away from her back to my own apartment.

In May, the two of us already went on a trip together to Italy to make sure it's also so great to be together while traveling. In October, I got invited to a coworker's wedding in Malta, where a few days before the ceremony, I asked Evelina to marry me.

Evelina helped and supported me so much emotionally when I had to fight against my ex-wife for my son. It was emotionally taxing to all of us, and I have to admit I couldn't have done it without Evelina. Since October 2017, Jasper has been living with us for half of his time or even more, and Evelina has shown herself to be an amazing mother. Sometimes a little strict, but at the same time kind, and helpful, and fair.

From there on out we started looking for a new home, which we already bought in the first week of 2018. Then came the renovations and redecoration.

Once we moved in in May, 2018, the next clear project became planning the wedding.

It was clear to both of us that we'd want something special, something different. Since we both love travel, we decided that our wedding would be an escape to somewhere abroad.

“...our wedding would be an escape to somewhere abroad.”

— Ilmar

We weighed different options against one another, and decided together that a beautiful sandy beach would be the way to go.

With Evelina, I felt like together we grew and became better every day. I feel like I've never had such a warm and tender connection with anyone besides Evelina. No one has ever cared for me as much as she does.

We weighed different options against one another, and decided together that a beautiful sandy beach would be the way to go.

With Evelina, I felt like together we grew and became better every day. I feel like I've never had such a warm and tender connection with anyone besides Evelina. No one has ever cared for me as much as she does.

In some ways we are so different, in others so alike. Ilmar is balanced, calm, and patient, I am sun and hailstorm. We both love to travel, we match in values and life philosophies. We never get bored and are instead always planning or doing something. Sometimes it feels like we've already been married for 20 years. I am just so grateful every single day that there is someone in my life who loves me the way that I am and next to whom I can wake up every morning for the rest of our lives.