Ragne & Eduard | Winter wedding in Toosikannu Holiday Center
Chapter 1: A Mysterious Message
This story began a little more than 2000 years after the birth of Christ among the nations of Northern Europe on a plot of land called Estonia. At a time when the coronavirus pandemic was still rampantly tearing up society, a story started sprouting in Tartu.
The protagonists of this story, Eduard and Ragne, had already left their first big traveling experiences behind and returned to their homeland. Ragne had collected a year in Sweden and five years in the Netherlands, whereas Eduard had gathered a year in Germany, one in France, and another in Russia. True, for some, those two might still be living somewhere abroad because the count was already lost, and who could keep up with those two anyway. Alas, recounting all their stories would require writing a book, so let’s save them for another time.
Upon reflection, this story has an even more enigmatic background than what may initially appear, and every ending marks a new beginning. This great and long story, that we shall unveil here, began exactly on February 25th, 2021, at 12:59 PM when Ragne sent the first message to Eduard on Facebook Messenger (there was such a thingy once upon a time). Unbeknownst to Ragne, that very morning Eduard’s 90-year-old grandmother had passed away, a significant figure in Eduard's life and an architect of his athletic path. In the wake of these two life-changing events, the cyclical nature of life is brought to light, where endings give way to new beginnings.
That message on February 25th read: “Hello, Eduard! I’m writing to you because I’m looking for people to join the pilot group for the very first discipleship course here in Tartu. I’ve been thinking of names and the youth recommended you.” As a sensible gentleman, Eduard took a day to think, asked some follow-up questions, and only then gave his final answer.
Wedding photographer: Valdur Rosenvald | Rosenvald Photography
Host: Herman & Kristel
Video: Matis Ottan
Ceremony place: Verona Apartments
Tseremoonia koht: Paide Püha Risti kirik
Venue: Toosikannu Holiday Center
Pastor: Meego Remmel
Bride’s makeup: Janeli Kuusk
Bride’s dress: Janeli Kuusk
Bridal bouquet & wedding flowers: Liisu Lilled
Wedding cake: Heikki Puhk
Wedding invitations: Eliisa Ladva
Wedding cake: Eike Ülevain
Catering: Toosikannu
Band: Bride and groom friends
Chapter 2: Still Waters Run Deep
There’s probably no point in reading into every message and analyzing every comma because one might find something that was never there. Yet we could say that the story of these two protagonists continued when they met for the first time on March 8th, 2021 at Ragne’s home in Tartu, where the first discipleship course meeting took place. These meetings started repeating every other week from March to the middle of May, giving Eduard and Ragne a safe and open environment to discuss all sorts of topics (regardless of the aim of those meetings being learning discipleship, the conversations always tended to stretch long into the night).
The discipleship course continued and everyone got to know one another better and better as they slowly became friends. To avoid leaving the wrong impression, the two still only met at the course and didn’t spend too much time talking outside of it. So there were no signs of anything beyond that. Or perhaps?
If we were to closely examine the past, then on April 19th, 2021 at 11:11 PM, after another discipleship course meeting, Eduard received a very cryptic message from Ragne, which read "Pretty random for you but God told me something very specific through you today." Everyone can decide for themselves whether to interpret this message or not. The meaning of the message remained a mystery even for Eduard, and perhaps only Ragne knows its true significance. However, for now, we will leave it be.
August 16th, 2021 was a noteworthy day because that was the first known written occasion where Ragne called Eduard Eedu, as she wrote to him: “Hei, Eedu! What are you doing on Thursday?”. Ragne was recruiting Eduard to a festival organized by the 3D church, and they ended up running a seminar together. The seminar was successful. (Or maybe now Ragne would say “succEeduful”, as an adjective she invented about Eedu.) Perhaps also noteworthy was Eduard’s message “Yep” on August 18th, in response to which Ragne used the heart emoji for the first time in their conversation. Despite all that, our two characters were still mere friends who didn’t spend that much time together until the start of the new school year when they started meeting at Agape Cafe’s events.
Chapter 3: The Beginning of the Agape Era
One event was a trip to Lithuania from October 1st to 4th, 2021. Together, they drove a minivan to pick up the group. The group went to a conference, a waterpark in Lithuania, the TV tower in Vilnius, and even the Riga Zoo in Latvia on their way back. However, due to a waterpark incident, Ragne was assigned to drive one of the cars and Eduard her map reader. Eduard of course initially had a clear plan and a vision of riding back with his buddies in the other car, but at the urging of the other drivers, he agreed to become Ragne’s co-driver.
On the way back, the backseat crowd spent most of their time asleep or engaged in their own conversations. Ragne and Eduard, however, had yet another long discussion about life. Admittedly, though, this time Eduard did most of the talking. Ragne grew tired after a few hours of listening and asking, realizing her friend Eduard only wanted to talk about himself and wasn’t asking any questions. Ragne fell quiet for a long time, simply enjoying the music. Yet, after an hour Eduard started slowly asking about Ragne, and the conversation ran on to the end of the trip. Among other things they discussed, what they wanted their future homes to look like.
Agape event series’ were just getting started. One of those where both of our protagonists were included was the Alpha Course that launched in October – every Wednesday evening seven weeks in a row. By then, Eduard and Ragne had started seeing each other more often. More movie nights with friends, more board games in Agape, and even a game of Alias they won together as a pair. Additionally, they both played volleyball with Ruut church.
On October 20th Eduard messaged Ragne: “Morning! I was just wondering if you’re in Tallinn today, right? I have an offer I figured you might be interested in.” Eduard wanted to ask Ragne to come to see his mother’s concert “Tango Concert La Paloma” in the Estonia Theater. During the conversation, it turned out that Eduard would’ve just given Ragne the ticket and sent her there alone. Discussing further, though, it was decided that they would both go. This was their first concert with just the two of them.
The Alpha Course continued. Eduard knew how to smuggle himself into Ragne's car every night for a ride home. Often they forgot themselves talking in the car for so long that Ragne’s roommate started to worry why she wasn’t home yet.
The fateful day became November 3rd, a Wednesday wherein the car ride after another Alpha Course meeting Ragne challenged Eduard to leave the car without making a single joke. Somehow that seemed to make Eduard fidgety. Somehow he brought up the topic of relationships and asked Ragne why she was still single (among Christians most 29-year-olds are already married after all?!). At some point, they each asked each other a description of what their dream spouse would be like, to make them give up their comfy independence of singleness. Ragne realized then that the man she was about to describe would be remarkably similar to Eduard. Quickly she had to make the list so he wouldn’t see the likeness. When asked to describe his ideal partner Eduard started squirming in his seat – the whole car was filled with his discomfort. Finally, after gathering himself he just said directly “I think you and I would make a pretty great duo”, and with those words, he stepped out of the car.
Ragne had gotten home. It was exactly 3:28 AM when she got a text from Eduard: “You might find a closed container of a buckwheat dish in your car”: “What buckwheat?!” Ragne thought, “You just threw something much more important into the air!”
The topic shifted quickly from buckwheat and the conversation returned to the bold suggestion of becoming a duo where Eduard explained himself further. Contrarily, our female protagonist was not interested in discussing her thoughts via text messages and wanted him to express his wishes directly. So Ragne said: “Maybe you should just ask me out then to know how I’d react?” Eduard responded with “Ah, aren’t you stubborn”, yet the very next day he did ask her out. The date was scheduled for November 4th at 9:30 PM in front of Werner Cafe.
PS! A few weeks later Ragne’s roommate found the buckwheat container under the passenger's seat and was very surprised at what it could be. Ragne just bellowed a laugh…
Chapter 4: The Initial Negotiations
Eduard was uncharacteristically already waiting in front of Werner when Ragne arrived characteristically early. Together they entered to order tea. Eduard was about to pay for his cup when he turned to Ragne asking: “You’ll pay for yourself, right?” Ragne didn’t actually care one way or another, she could’ve easily paid the whole bill herself, too, but the question was still a blow to the start of the date. Meanwhile, Eduard was trying to prevent a future date from having to be canceled due to a lack of funds, as money can be tight for a student. On the other hand, he was also trying to respect Ragne’s independence, though at that moment it came out wrong. Let it be said that they each paid for their own tea. Since Ragne enjoys her tea at a mellow sipping temperature she refused a lid, only to regret it many hours later.
They went for a walk. Ragne needed Eduard to ask for her opinion. During the drive back from Lithuania, Eduard didn’t show much interest in that, but was he about to? The first hour and a half turned into a warmup where they spoke of anything and everything but the elephant in the room. Until Ragne just said: “If you want to know what I think of this, you will need to ask.” And so the conversation finally found the right thread to run along for hours, as the two walked through the entire city. At one point when they reached the train station, it began pouring rain. It was already after midnight. But the conversation didn’t feel finished. Eduard suggested going to Agape to find some warmth and finish their talk there.
In Agape they found some good cocoa, a blue couch to sit on (facing each other), and a fun ball with pineapples on it. They talked through whether a five-year age gap would be significant, whether both would be willing to live abroad for periods of their lives, what should a marriage look like… The choice of topics is no wonder, as neither wanted to blindly jump into a relationship. Both agreed that there is only a point to getting into a relationship when there is potential for a marriage. After Eduard, the law student, they call this conversation still “the pre-contractual negotiations”. For the discussion, they used the pineapple ball that the speaker would hold and throw to the other when their turn was over.
So the hours passed in Agape. Eduard felt that there was already so much invested in this conversation and thought they would be ready to get into a relationship. Ragne, though, still needed convincing. She had a theory: all relationships could be made to work between whoever, but the difference came from whether there would be 70% natural click and 30% of work or 30% natural click 30% and 70% work. All relationships have to put in work but if the work has to take up so much time, then the marriage will never get to fulfill its purpose – create good outside of the two. Together they tried to figure out how much natural click they have. Let the specific percentages remain a mystery for now, but considering the current context, we can guess it fell somewhere over 50%.
The negotiations were successful. Eduard and Ragne decided they would become a couple. At the same time, they decided to keep it a secret at first. This way, both would have time to ask questions and get to know each other before everyone else starts bombarding them with theirs.
Their first official date, which Eduard organized, took place on December 4th, 2021 in Vanemuine Theater where they saw “Don Giovanni”. After that Eduard invited his girlfriend to his place for the first time. Legend says it took him the entire day to clean his bachelor’s pad and prepare a dinner: curtains became a tablecloth, the guitar became wall decor, furniture got reorganized, and even candles were bought. (The apartment being so clean was a hint to Eduard’s roommate that someone had visited, most likely a woman.)
Slowly their friends around them started hearing the news. Somehow Ragne’s sister got also clued in and promised to keep a secret but was very eager to know when the new guy would be introduced to the family.
Eduard’s birthday was on February 4th. Since Eduard decided he couldn’t be bothered with throwing a party, then Ragne thought that as a good girlfriend, she should still do it secretly. Although Ragne was yet to meet Eduard’s family and training mates, a common friend still helped her throw a kickass celebration. Arriving at the surprise birthday party Eduard awed in every direction at everyone there. That was a proper arrival of his 25th year of life! (That was also the first time Ragne met Eduard’s only slightly older big sister.)
Meeting the families took some time. Ragne’s family saw the two for the first time on March 6th when she said: “I’m bringing a friend along for my nephew’s birthday party.” See, both Eduard and Ragne’s nephew were law students, so this seemed to make sense. Ragne’s family loved Eduard from the start and when she visited the next time, her niece asked: “But why are you alone, where’s your boyfriend?”. Eduard’s family got the meeting a month later, on April 17th.
Soon it became Eduard’s turn to think of something for his girlfriend’s birthday. He, too, arranged a surprise on July 14th. To celebrate his girlfriend’s 30th he gathered nearly 50 friends, and together they gifted Ragne an electrical scooter that she’d been talking about for a long time by then.
Eduard had also learned how important Range's nieces and nephews were to her. To decorate the gift more personally he asked the kids to make drawings for the wrapping. But that wasn’t all. Eduard is a thorough and thoughtful soul. For a personal birthday gift, he gave Ragne a note that read: “Offer. Tallinn → Hamburg → Amsterdam → Paris → Bordeaux”. Together they decided that August would be spent on that route.
Chapter 5: The Promise of a Wife
Friday, the 14th of October, 2022 was a strange situation. From Google Maps Ragne saw that Eduard was in Põltsamaa without her (they had shared their locations with each other for months already). Why is Eduard in Põltsamaa? Why is he not responding to texts? Despite those questions, Ragne decided to not prod until the man himself spoke of it.
At the same time in Põltsamaa. Also included in this story are the Jürgens family who, despite the late hour, lent Eduard a car and supplied him with a freshly bought quality sausage. Ragne’s father was already waiting after all and Eduard needed something to bring him. That resolved, there was nothing left to do but get on the road to his potential father-in-law. Fortunately for Eduard, the rest of the family was in the sauna at the time and he was greeted by none other than his girlfriend’s dad. Eduard was invited in where he presented the sausage. His future father-in-law poured coffee and made sandwiches and the aforementioned sausage was also swiftly consumed by the two. Eduard spoke of his plans of marriage to Ragne and officially asked for her father’s blessing. Purportedly it was a warm conversation. The father gave words of wisdom on how a man needed to work to provide for his family and such. Both were pleased with how the visit went.
Saturday, October 15th. Ragne had had a long week: extra work from GoWorkABit, lectures from Tallinn University, recording a podcast, and so on. Ragne was just coming from a lecture back towards Tartu. She and Eduard had agreed to meet in Agape since the chairs needed to be put in place for Ruut church the next day. But that’s not quite how it went…
Ragne parked her car in front of Agape and reached the front door. It was open. During that time it would usually be closed. She steps in and sees… Eduard! In a shirt and vest, holding a guitar on the other side of the room. Ragne takes off her coat and steps closer. She notices the rose blossoms and the candles. Eduard starts to sing. The situation becomes suspiciously special. Eduard sings another song. The song ends. Eduard walks to Ragne, falls to one knee, and asks in his very masculine voice: “Ragne Kivimets, will you become my wife?”
Thoughts flash in Ragne’s head, would it be inappropriate to make a joke? But to spare the man from that she quickly replies with: “Of course!” (True, Eduard has still never received an actual “Yes.”). Already their friends jump out of the small side room with balloons and congratulations. Quickly it comes to taking pictures, having dinner, and suggesting potential dates for the wedding.
So, when’s the wedding? A week after the engagement serious discussions began. It was still unclear whether Eduard would be accepted for an internship in Berlin from March to July 2023. They considered a wedding in August after Berlin. They also considered a wedding in February before Berlin. Though Eduard humbly assessed his chances of being accepted to Berlin as slim, Ragne was convinced they would never find another man of his caliber. So they landed on February, *veto-*d Estonia’s Independence Day and the weekend of track and field nationals, and thus landed on February 11th, 2023.
It was time for the in-laws to meet. That happened on December 1st, 2022 in Tallinn where Eduard’s parents hospitably greeted them. Common subjects were quickly found.
Chapter 6: The Great Supper (wedding)
Paide, February 11th, 2023 at precisely 14:30. Guests who had gathered from all over Estonia and flown in from the Netherlands and Germany, were all eagerly awaiting the bride’s arrival. The musicians strike their first chords, the doors fall open… and the rest is still cherished in our memories.
“We are elated that you have all gathered here in Toosikannu, to witness our story and cheer along and that you have reached this point of this long story with us. Our wish for our wedding is that you meet this wonderful group of friends and the family that we cherish so deeply. Enjoy and celebrate today with us hold nothing back!”
Chapter 7: The Long Drive
On February 12th, 2023, the newlyweds set off on their honeymoon in Tenerife. When they reach Estonia again, they have a few days to pack everything into their tiny red Škoda to start the 18-hour drive to Berlin for the next 5 months… See you all again in August, probably in Tartu!
